No.139 : The Double (2011)

The Double at the IMDb

Have you ever seen a spy film? If the answer is ‘Yes’ then you have already seen large chunks of ‘The Double’.

Richard Gere stars as Paul, a retired agent who spent 20 years trying to track down arch bad guy, Cassius. He’s called back into action when Cassius’ signature garrote murder technique is used to kill off a senator. Young whizz kid analyst, Topher Grice, is teamed up with the reluctant Gere to try and finally nail the bad guy.

Of course Gere is reluctant at first, but soon the young agent wins his grudging respect. With occasional input from an embarrassed looking Martin Sheen, playing a sector chief , the unlikely and mismatched duo start to fit the case together.

But wait! Can it be so straight forward? Will ‘the double’ of the title refer to a lookalike or maybe a double agent? Is everyone the person they say they are? Is anyone?

This was a really terrible thriller that made no sense at all, and had such unwieldy pot turns you’d think that the writers were plucking random ideas out of a big bowl and sticking them together to make a script.

The film opens with a scene of some Mexican migrants getting killed off for no apparent reason. Maybe it was lifted from a Trump election broadcast? It’s brought up later on but just as a minor plot point not the pivotal event that the scene suggests.

Gere is the clichéd, jaded ex-agent reluctant to get back on the job and even less keen to take a rookie under his wing. Topher offers little as greenhorn agent Ben, who starts out in awe of Gere but after a few scenes in his company stars to smell a rat - or was it a hamster?

The initial wrong foot was decently handled, but in retrospect it couldn’t have gone any other way. Who is the shadowy villain? Well you only have two choices and the title is a bit of a giveaway. As it is, we get wrong footed twice but not in a satisfying manner - in a ‘that doesn’t make a lick of sense’ kind of way.

The film probably sneaked a release on the back of its star names, but everyone looks disinterested and, apart from one decent car crash, there is nothing memorable about this film at all.

The same 'wire from the watch' murder gets carried out so often, you’d think the prop must have been rented for the weekend and they had to get as much use out of it as possible.

The characters are as thin as a steamrolled pizza with the female  parts being especially weak. Topher’s wife has nothing to do apart from simper a lot and fail to fall off a ladder.

Gere wins no empathy points at all and is downright creepy in places. In one scene at a pee-wee baseball game a lady asks him which kid is his. Gere say none, he just likes to watch. Why child services weren’t immediately called, I don’t know.

The film saunters to a low rent showdown in a warehouse with outrageous revelations being piled on top of a steaming load of unlikely events.

I’m not 100% sure who was doing what to whom at the end, but that’s OK - none of the characters did either.

THE Tag line - Double your fun - watch a party election broadcast instead.

33%

No.118 : The Beaver (2011)

The Beaver at the IMDb

This is a strange film that, if it had been described to you, you’d have thought it to be some sort of wacky spoof. It is real and I can testify to that as I had 90 minutes in the company of Mel Gibson talking through a beaver hand puppet. Maybe it’ll have something to say about damaged people and our perceptions of others? Or will it show that Mel’s decline shows no sign of hitting bottom?

Mel plays Walter a toy company owner who has a touch of depression. He’s married to Jodie Foster (who also directs) and the marriage isn’t going too well. Mel has two sons ; one a teenager who hates him and another who is a pre-schooler. The teenager is logging the similarities between himself and his Dad whilst writing exam papers for fellow students. The pre-schooler isn’t connecting with Mel but a good bit of puppetry will sort that relationship out!

After two years of trying to make the depressed marriage work Jodie kicks Mel out on his ass. Mel visits a dumpster to lose some stuff but finds a hand puppet beaver instead, which he immediately installs on his arm. He talks to himself and others through the beaver in a dreadful cockney accent and tries to kill himself in a half hearted attempt involving his tie and a shower rail.

On hearing of the new beaver Jodie unbelievably lets Mel back into the house and soon the marriage starts to improve. At work, after giving out cards explaining the beaver off as a psychiatric device, Mel reenergises his workforce and soon their ‘beaver kit’ is the toy hit of the year.

Elsewhere, Mel’s rudderless son is making friends with the smartest girl in school who wants him to write her a speech for her graduation. They also explore their love for tagging and her feeling of loss for her dead brother - she’s got issues too, you see!

Soon Mel is no longer talking from the beaver and it develops his own voice. Jodie is unhappy with the rodent’s planned appearance at her anniversary dinner and it may be that power tools are the only way to separate man from cuddly toy. Will the various problem people find redemption? And will the stuffed toy take all the acting awards for this frankly weird film?

This was as strange a 90 minutes of Hollywood film that you can imagine. An A-list cast involve themselves with a cheap Muppet while playing it straight. Issues such as detachment and isolation are touched on but you never get away from the guy out of ‘Lethal Weapon’ talking to a glove puppet as an equal. The puppet is never animated and the whole thing is ground solidly in reality with all the laughs of the nervous and awkward nature.

I can only imagine the whole project looked like a worthy examination of mental health but it just came across as totally  mental. Gibson lacked his usual charm and looked lost throughout. Foster was better and her irritation with her husband seemed real - no doubt she channelled her feelings of being involved in this farce!

I’m all for actors taking a chance and trying something ‘out there’ but this was an uncomfortable and strange venture that will do nothing to aid the understanding of either mental health issues or the troubles faced by beaver puppets stuffed into dumpsters.

THE Tag Line - Even Madder Max!  33%