Showing posts with label con man. Show all posts
Showing posts with label con man. Show all posts

Thursday, 2 November 2017

No.128 : The Handmaiden (2016)




 Sometimes Worlds Collide when you have a few movie blogs and undocumented challenges. One such event precipitated my viewing of ‘The Handmaiden’ as I checked up to see if I was still able to claim that I’d seen every film on the IMDb top 250. Alas I had only seen 242 and although some like ‘Dead Poets Society’ and ‘Paper Moon’ will be picked up without comment, this effort at No.246 merits some Definite Article assessment.

It’s a subtitled Korean film that runs for 140 minutes - but don’t let that put you off - there are ample things to keep you interested such as a lush period setting and an intricate yet enjoyable plot. Oh and some hardcore lesbian sex; it has that too.

The film is set in the 1930’s during Japan’s occupation of Korea. We meet some street urchin mums who are vying for a job. We learn that 'career criminal' is the local trade and one girl hooks up with local villain ‘The Count’ to enact an elaborate scam on a Japanese heiress. The Count is a career con man and plans to seduce the heiress for her cash before decanting her to the nut house. The young girl, Sook-Hee, takes on the job as handmaiden to the heiress so she can facilitate The Count’s trip into the heiress’ bed and indeed, bank account.

The film is split into three acts and the first deals with the plan and how it plays out initially. The heiress has an aged uncle who has fallen on hard times and makes his living by forging dirty books which he has the heiress read to a group of seedy noblemen in the hope that they'll buy one for the long rickshaw ride home. The language here is a bit saucy, although they use a lot of metaphor. Either that or someone’s ‘Jade Gate’ is going to need hosed down in the morning. The Uncle also has designs on the fortune so our crafty pair have to outsmart him as well as avoid the usual pitfalls of falling in love and being played themselves.

The plan goes well until there is a masterful wrong foot and then Act 2 begins. This replays many of the events we have already witnessed, but from different characters' perspectives. Things that seemed plain to see are spun in different directions and it’s unclear who is playing who and for what ends. I won’t spoil the outcome here but there were plenty of surprising turns and others not so shocking, but welcome nonetheless.

The initial sex scenes were somewhat tame but once retold the story got a lot more explicit - a bit like the Uncle’s smutty drawings. The webs of deceit were expertly spun and the film flew past as various preconceptions were blown away and replaced with something even more shocking but still plausible.

You will need to give the film your full attention so as not to miss a lot of the subtle, and not so subtle hints. It is elegantly shot with high production values - it’s only a shame that the evil old Uncle looked about 30 with a grey wig on. There is some really nasty violence and some full on lesbian sex - but I was prepared to endure this for the excellent story that emerged, that captivated and surprised in equal measure.

Overall this is a worthy addition to the IMDb Top 250 and indeed to this fine blog!

THE Tag Line : ‘The Scissor Sisters in Concert!’ 85%

Tuesday, 1 June 2010

No.37 : The Squeeze (1987)



Let’s get a bit obscure now on The Definite Article Movie list with this clunker comedy from 1987 which stars Michael Keaton. Keaton was only two years away from his star turns in ‘Batman’ and ‘Pacific Heights’ so it’s just as well the producers of those hits missed out on this effort which is short on laughs, drama and basically anything that makes a film worth watching. And look at that poster too! - Was Bin Laden a secret fan?!

Keaton plays the poorly defined Harry who is a loser hustler one minute and creator of pretty impressive dinosaurs made out of TVs the next. He has a strangely motivated sidekick in Joe Pantolianio who seems to get nothing from the relationship other than a loss of his cash and occasional beating. Maybe I missed the gay subtext? Well it is the 80’s you can’t judge by the haircuts and loud, baggy shirts.

The film opens with our likely lads executing the poorest card hustle you’ve ever seen, unless you watched ‘Big Deal’ like I did. As our heroes make good their escape Keaton’s ex-wife is trying to post a package twice as big as the mail box. Maybe they shrunk overnight or she’d never posted anything before, but it was never going in, Love.

On getting back home she finds her cat chowing down on a finger and sussing that the game was up she runs off to enlist Keaton’s help. He is strangely agreeable to this despite her debt collector being on his back for unpaid maintenance. After recovering the box and determining it to be a big magnet Keaton hooks up with the debt collector lady to try and work out why the mysterious Frenchman and his goons need the box back before the lottery is drawn.

This isn’t that bad a film, it’s just nothing special and I defy you to remember one thing about it in a month’s time, apart from the massive triceratops made out of TV sets. Keaton plays his usual mulleted, maniacal self which I always find a bit tiresome. He does OK with a weak script and poor character definition but it’s hard to care for a shiftless loser trying to con a fast buck.

Pantoliano gets very little to do and given this was the guy who played Ralphie in ‘The Sopranos’ that was a waste. Speaking of waists Meat Loaf also shows up as a henchman and despite having one of the strongest voices in rock he plays a mute who only gets one line when he’s been stabbed with the Empire State Building - well a model of it at any rate.

The love interest is provided by Rae Dong Chong who sets feminism back 20 years by falling for the alimony dodging Keaton 10 minutes after meeting him. The chemistry isn’t there at all and the devices that bring them together, like a mutual love of ‘Raw Hide’, seem strained at best.

The plot is wafer thin and involves the magnetising of lottery balls to swindle the jackpot. The draw, which is naturally held on the deck of an aircraft carrier, has scandalously low security which lets our cast manipulate the result and shoot off rockets like no one cares who gets the $55 million.

To pick plot holes in the flimsy narrative would be as hard as getting sand in your ass crack at the beach and frankly less fun. It’s not edgy or offensive with there being no sex or swearing to juice things up and without that you’re left with a largely disinterested cast running around for a 100 minutes before the hero has to decide between the money and the girl. ‘The Squeeze’? Puleeze!

THE Tag Line : Lottery Swindle Flick Is A Lot Of Balls 46%