No.187 : The Hexecutioners (2015)

The Hexecutioners at the IMDb

This film is set in a world where euthanasia has been legalised. As long as you have the correct paperwork you are fine to employ an agency who will send over a worker to dispatch your ailing loved one in the manner of your choosing. You’d think that such a job would demand a strong person with a lot of life experience, but actually you just need to be a pretty young woman. One such worker is Malison whom we meet on her first day in the job. Somewhat strangely she is sent on her own and it’s no surprise when she makes a right pig’s ear of it.

The comatose old woman she’s supposed to put down wakes up after her ‘lethal’ injection, throws up and calls Malison a murderer. You’d think the husband would be happy to see his wife out of the coma, but instead he finishes the old gal off with a pillow.

Somewhat distressed Mel, as she mother used to call her, heads home but is soon evicted from her flat when her landlord learns of her occupation - and of her cat. She abandons the cat in a field and heads of to her next assignment. Learning of her bang up job on the old woman, Mel’s boss pairs her up with an experienced employee, Olivia, who doesn’t wear a bra and is happy to complete her assignments without complaint, even if it means blowing people’s brains out, so that Mel can learn the ropes.

The mismatched pair head off to a mansion with the big pair of CGI gates as seen in the poster above. Falling short of ‘employee of the month’ once again, Mel faints on the doorstep and has visions of a large group of cultists in masks approaching an alter as well as of the old, now dead, woman. Well they’d probably paid her for the day and had put her make up on already.

They meet creepy Edgar who tends to the needs of the girls’ next job, who has the same stylist as Gary Oldman had in ‘Hannibal’. The termination contract contains lots of extra details including cutting the body up and feeding it to the birds whilst text is read from a creepy tome. This is a $1m contract - wonder why the boss sent two emotional ladies? - and they resolve not to get involved. The old house soon exerts its influence on the girls however, with their behaviours changing and the previously prim Mel looking for some lesbian action which Olivia refuses - as is her right. Boo Hiss!

The day of the termination is looming and Mel is having more and more creepy visions. Will the planned ritual go ahead and what is it in aid of? Will our girls survive and will Mel’s housing problem be resolved?

I was surprised this film only had an IMBd rating of 4/10 as I quite enjoyed it. It was small scale and low budget but was teeming with ideas and grisly imagery. I wasn’t 100% sure what was going on but it was the usual stuff about human sacrifices and portals. It was quite creepy throughout and there were some decent touches such as the ritual being chroma keyed, with only the reds showing against a washed out background.

The two female leads were good with Liv Collins handling the transition from mouse to vixen with aplomb. Sarah Power as Olivia had less of a story arc but more than made up for that in other ways. Er, dramatic acting ways!

It didn’t set the heather alight but as a late night offering on the Horror Channel this was a welcome find and one well worth seeking out.

THE Tag Line Getting ready For Bed - and Other Scenes Too! 66%

No.18 : The Informant! (2009)

The Informant! at the IMDb

You can almost see the scene; the marketing team for this movie have a hard job. It involves complex ideas of bribery and corruption and has no sex scenes or car chases - how can we convince the audience that this is in fact a jaunty comedy worth their seven quid? Yes, I’ve got it - stick an exclamation point on the end of the title, that’ll do it. We can also make the graphics a bit wacky and have a seemingly inappropriate kooky soundtrack - that’ll show them.

I actually quite enjoyed this film, but to call it a comedy would be stretching things and the whole films hangs on a single premise - Matt Damon lies a lot. Damon plays Mark Whitacre a bio-chemist at a chemical plant who has found himself in a corporate role. He develops products from corn and finds himself in a hard spot when a new strain of a chemical fails. He tells his boss that there is sabotage in place and he’s received a demand for $10 million for the name of the mole and the formula to save the new chemical.

Things go smoothly at first when the guy off ‘Quantum Leap’ is assigned to be his FBI handler in their investigation of the extortion attempt. Mark thinks that he’s being set up as the fall guy as he regularly calls Japan, the source of the ransom demands. He decides to become an informant against the company and spills the beans on all their schemes involving global price fixing.

For a while Mark is the hero and gets evidence of secret meetings and deals. Things start to go awry however when his stories start to get a bit far fetched and his own dealings come under scrutiny. Before long egg is on all the faces as Mark is exposed as an inveterate liar and the biggest crook at the table.

With the company and the FBI both looking a bit silly can Mark stay out of jail and keep his ill gotten gains which keep escalating in value as the film progresses?

That quality overview of the film may make it look a bit dry and to be honest it is. The set up is OK and I enjoyed the various companies and agencies all being as incompetent as each other. Matt Damon does a good job with the lying and we genuinely believe his character is a corporate crusader at first before his world of lies gradually unravels about him.

It’s probably all the ‘Bourne’ films on his resume but I wasn’t convinced that the 40 year old Damon was this flabby, balding lair with a bio-chemistry degree and nice taste in ties. He gives good value in the more ridiculous scenes but less so in the ones where he was being earnest and forthright. His get out clause is of course that his character is a liar so any unbelievable stuff was just that character trait bleeding out.

The film does well to maintain your interest through a lot of scenes that are just middle aged men talking around various tables. The running gag that the money embezzled went up every time it was mentioned was quite funny but apart from that there weren’t too many laughs. I did like Mark’s internal monologue which often had no bearing on the matter at hand but came into sharper focus as the lies tumbled down.

Further down the cast list it was nice to see Kurgan off ‘Highlander’ in a tie and Scott Bakula did OK as the hapless FBI agent. Damon’s wife was a bit thinly drawn and we never really got to the heart of her motivations - I guess it was keeping the nice house and that’s it.

The film opens with a caption saying they’ve changed stuff and ends with some others that explain what happened next. Seeing as you don’t know what’s was true and what wasn’t this was pretty pointless but overall I quite enjoyed this tale of lies, greed and more lies.


THE Tag Line : Believe Me It’s Not Bad 66%